How To Deal With Pain

I created Advanced Style to start a dialogue about aging and to show a
positive and uplifting image of getting older. It’s equally important
to show how older people confront the struggles and difficulties that
accompany the aging process. Artist, Ilona Royce Smithkin lifts the
spirits of everyone around her. She was kind enough to  share some
incredible insight into how she deals with physical pain. We can all
learn from her inspiring words below:

something unexpected happens to our bodies. I fight everyday to get up
and out of bed.When I feel a pain somewhere I tell my body, “I’m so nice
to you, what do you want from me?” And I tell myself a little story or
joke and remind myself of the times when I was in worse pain, and how
lucky I am today, and the pain begins to go away. I tell myself that
this isn’t the first time, or the last time that I will feel pain and begin to occupy my mind with other things. You must get involved in things
outside of the pain, things that give you interest. All these things
are a part of life. We all feel pain and unpleasantness. As long as I
can seduce myself to enjoy all kinds of things, like in the morning
enjoying the first cup of coffee, or piece of chocolate the pain begins
to diminish. I give myself nice things to look forward to, throughout
the day. The moment you give in and let yourself get dragged down by
misery you are closer to death.

  • how eloquent

  • That was truly beautiful.

  • Thank you Llona. These are words I will remember each day when I get up in the morning. Your strength impresses me. Thank you for sharing these words and thanks Ari, great post.

  • well said. Some days when I'm not feel well, I'm so grateful I have a job. I put on something pretty, go to work and feel much better.

  • Oh this is PERFECT. Not just a photo of the person but including their words of wisdom. I would like to see everyone you photograph give us their secrets to a long and fulfilling life. It is so inspiring!!!! Thank you Liona

  • So lovely. So true.

  • Lovely message from a lovely woman …

  • What a FABULOUS lady! ♥

  • This remarkable human being knows what she is talking about. Pay attention.

  • First Ari, I would like to thank you for all you do. Your purpose is so noble and your message so true.

    Second, sharing the words of this lovely sassy lady made me weep as I contemplate the pain my own mother is often in. Thank you for the sunshine.

  • she's so wonderful and my idol

  • Anonymous

    She is such a lovely lady and a true inspiration. I, too, regard her as an icon and a pattern for my own advanced style. All your ladies have awakened a new appreciation for aging.

  • Thank you for sharing these words. They got me a little teary. I am going to print them and remember them. Thank you.

  • Anonymous

    Thank you, Ilona!
    Thank you, Ari!

  • I love her heart. xox

  • Ilona's words brought tears to my eyes and a smile to my lips. She is truly a beautiful person with a lovely outlook on life. I wish more people were like her. xx

  • Great inspiration from a great lady.

  • Inspirational!

  • Inspirational!

  • How I would enjoy having the first cup of coffee in the morning, having a chat with this wise and wonderful lady. How lucky both of you are, Ari, to know each other. x

  • Perfect timing (as are all your posts). Helpful to all of us at any age.

  • Anonymous

    just sent this to my dad, who has pretty much become his headache. maybe he will listen to her.

    great advice for all of us – no matter our age.

    gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. and being in loving dialogue with our wonderful bodies.

    thanks for posting!


  • lei

    How fortunate you are to have this beautiful woman in your life and how fortunate we are that you share her wisdom with us. thank you!

  • eli

    She is a wunderful great Lady!
    Thank you Ari
    Thank you Ilona


  • i just loved reading these beautiful words….. truly a light for us all, thank you!! xx

  • Anonymous

    Beautiful,true,and real. Thank you, precious one for sharing..

  • What a wonderful philosophy! Such wonderful wisdom. I have a few people who are in chronic pain and I will share this with them. I'm also having aches and pains as I "advance" and I have been practicing this but not as consciously or eloquently as dea Ilona. Thank you for sharing and for this blog, Ari.

  • Wise and lovely words. Thank you.

  • Wise words spoken by an ever inspiring woman!

  • 33

    thank you ari for treasuring and documenting these seasoned souls. we tend to forget about our elders but we shouldn't. there's so much to learn from them, like ilona.

    i will remember this lesson, to be grateful for what i have each day, less bitching and more giving thanks.

    please tell ilona that her words have touched me and many others.


  • This is the state of mind we should all aspire to, at any age. So true.

  • Anonymous

    Ilona – you are magnificent! Would that all of us, as we age and develop pains and creaks, have such a positive outlook. (And while you're at it, you could come and give a talking to to my 74-year-old sister, who does nothing but whine about her health, which isn't even that terrible…*sigh*)

  • I remembered my mother who is 83 years old and in great pain every day, it has many health problems. She says that when you go out get distracted and forget a bit of pain, so it is always ready for parties and tours. Laughs at your pain and try to always take life with optimism. I hope it always as a reference when you need to face my worst days. Congratulations on your materials, I am your admirer and their models.
    Vanda Panzica